Posts from the ‘England’ Category

When trains to London are too expensive

I get a coach… Not cool.. Especially if the seat next to you is occupied by a large chav type man… I swear this is the only time I am all evil…. Last time I was on a coach, there was plenty of space but the above mentioned sat himself next to me. (I had no intentions of sitting through a three hour coach trip with a Miniature Yokozuna.. At least Yokozuna was famous). When one of my friend’s phoned me up I whispered (Of course I knew Mini Yoko was listening) to her saying “Aiyo, there is a fat man next to me men…” He glared at me, got up and switched seats… (I have a halo that occasionally glows… most of the time the horns protrude).


Some don’t take a subtle hint….for those type of people, I usually start coughing like a dying TB patient… (Proper clearing throat and everything) they look worried, stare at me ( I know they are thinking “contagious contagious”) they get up, and switch seats…

Sounds evil – works like a charm. Bright side – travelling in comfort – for cheap. (Based on this post and my doings – I think I’ll end up in hell… at least I can chill with satan and put a good shot of arrack).

The brightside of Manchester

I am not a fan of the A50 and the M6. Definitely not when I’m stuck on the M6 for an hour with a conference I was supposed to attend 30 minutes ago. (To be fair, it was on cloud computing.. who the hell cares? That was NOT what I signed up for!!)  I’m sat in traffic, listening to (or at least trying to listen to) a full song on radio but it keeps tuning into traffic updates (No shit – I know there’s a jam.. I’m bloody stuck in it!)

Almost two hours (late), trying to park (Yes, when you’re a woman it’s just harder.. thats how it rolls), finally walking to wherever this conference was being held, probably less than a mile away it rains (When does it ever NOT rain in Manchester?) I have no clue where I’m going and I’m positive I’m slightly lost. Despite the horrible traffic and rainy/ gloomy start, I can’t help but notice the little things I’ve never stopped to look at when I used to visit Manchester. (Probably because yaka was getting hangover girl very drunk or feeding her ten eggs a day). The people seemed cheerful somehow (one of them walked me right to my destination) and the buildings seemed different. For a change, I was noticing Peter Street,  Oxford Street and everything else other than the pubs. (Yes, I sometimes focus on other things too when yaka is not distracting me with a bottle).

I think Manchester is pretty. Despite the rain , but it won’t be Manchester without it. There was a bald construction worker (if he had to bend over anymore I would’ve seen a butt crack I’d never want to see) blaring his music. I barely listen to The Killers or know more than two of their songs, but this stuck in my head even afterwards, and for some reason, maybe it’s the beat, title.. no idea – it will ring a bell and remind me of the brightside of Manchester along with the drunken staggering times 4-5 years ago (Has it been that long?) , the drunk magic bus rides to Fallowfield and making  kavum for avurudu during my short weekend visits…